***
`Toshi? Toshi…where are you? Hide wants to…' Yoshi pushed
open the door to the guest bedroom but stopped when he realised that it
was currently being used by a famous rock star and his girlfriend.
`Sorry!' he apologised quickly shutting the door but his lips twitched
as he suppressed a smile. He walked quickly along the landing continuing
his search but now being sure to knock loudly before attempting to enter
any room. However each time he came up with nothing to show for his efforts
and it was really starting to piss him off.
`In a house this big, he could be anywhere,' he muttered under his breath.
However that was exactly what he had loved about this house in the first
place. His home was the very epitome of spacious minimalist design, a
marriage of pristine angular white walls and modern black patent leather
furniture. It was his haven, situated at the very fringe of Tokyo's metropolis,
where he went to get away and disappear.
However these days he was home less and less as X Japan seemed to be constantly
touring, doing promotions or at the studio recording new material. It
was so spotlessly clean that you would have been forgiven for thinking
that it was a showroom, only the various awards and pictures on the walls
showing that someone actually lived there.
From the landing, you were treated to a complete view of the foyer, which
was normally empty save his gleaming black grand piano. Now however it
was full to the brim, with people even spilling out onto the lawn despite
the chilly weather. In the center of all that stood Hide, dressed in eye
catching designer turquoise, the slightly tipsy sparkle in his eyes telling
Yoshi that he was definitely enjoying himself, which made the drummer
pleased.
`At least he's happy,' he winced a little as he caught a glimpse of himself
in the hallway mirror. As a sort of extra birthday present to him, the
rest of X Japan had agreed to dress up the way he wanted….a decision
they had all swiftly come to regret.
`Actually, I got off easy,' he thought ruefully looking down at the ensemble
that Hide had picked for him. He had on leather trousers that were so
tight that it was a minor miracle he was even able to breathe. It was
held together by panels of transparent black fabric running the entire
length of the sides revealing to the world that the drummer wasn't wearing
underwear in any shape or form. His shirt was delicate handmade lace and
the ends of his coloured hair feathered with wax so that it softly framed
his face. His eyelids were coloured translucent cobalt blue and his lips
painted a luscious shade of plum.
However in all honestly, the look wasn't that drastically different from
what he had previously worn on stage. But his outfit paled in comparison
to what Toshi was wearing, or more accurately what Hide made him wear.
Hence why he was looking for him, the vocalist was hiding.
`There you are!' he exclaimed finally spotting him in the gym, `Come downstairs,
Hide wants to show you off.' But the vocalist just stubbornly shook his
head.
`I am NOT some prize pony to be paraded around Yoshi!' he protested hotly,
the blood rushing to his cheeks. Yoshi sighed, only the slightest bit
exasperated at his friend. Actually he could understand Toshi's awkwardness,
for even when X Japan were all about Glam he always tended to be a touch
conservative. Yoshi always had to push him to choose more daring outfits
that were in keeping with their image and even then it was an uphill battle.
And he had certainly never worn something like this before, which even
Yoshi thought borderlined obscene.
Instead of trousers he had on lacy patterned leggings his modesty preserved
only by a pair of vinyl hotpants, matched with what Hide had called `smack-my-bitch-up'
boots. Over it, he wore a heavily embroidered floor length blue jacket
held closed by a single button at his navel. His normally dark hair was
now bronze thanks to the aid of temporary hair colour and glittery blue-black
eyeshadow along with dark cherry red lip-gloss completed the look.
`Why the hell did I agree to…'
`Because it's his birthday and we all promised,' Yoshi interjected tugging
at his arm but Toshi was surprisingly strong when he wanted to be. Seeing
that his friend was definitely not budging, he sighed and said.
`Look, Heath and Pata have more to be self-conscious about that you and
they're out there,' Yoshi pointed out. The drummer had him by the balls
there Toshi begrudgingly admitted.
For them Hide had picked almost identical outfits consisting of embellished
jeans, tailored shirts, leather vests and lots of silver jewelry differing
only in the colour of their shirts, with the bassist wearing blue and
Pata wearing red. It was a nod that was as good as a sly wink from the
guitarist in regards to their relationship.
`Fine!' Toshi stormed out into the landing but still unused to the boots,
caught his heel on the thick white carpeting and almost fell headlong
down the stairs if he hadn't quickly gotten hold of the banister. Yoshi
instantly burst out laughing stopping only when the vocalist glared at
him.
`Just WAIT! Hide is going to regret he ever…,' Toshi trailed off
as he saw Yoshi look over the banister, staring as if transfixed at something
at the door. He followed Yoshi's eyes and saw Omi and Aya just coming
through the door. To be more precise, Yoshi's gaze rested on Aya who was
dressed in gunmetal silk, the classic colour a foil for his unconventional
looks.
A flicker of concern crossed the vocalist's face; it worried him actually
this hold that this man seemed to have over his friend. Yoshi for all
his mystery when performing, possessed an extremely down to earth, no-nonsense
personality that delighted and disappointed fans in equal measure when
they met him. Interestingly enough, Aya's personality mirrored that of
Yoshi's stage one, aloof and sensual without meaning to be. He just hoped
Yoshi knew what he was getting into.
`Lets go greet them shall we,' he said, taking hold of Yoshi's hand and
pulling him down the stairs.
At the doorway, Omi was clearly in awe of his surroundings while Aya was
looking decidedly less than impressed, in fact if there were a word to
describe his expression it would be wary.
`We shouldn't be here Omi,' Aya said looking as if he would bolt out the
door given the chance. Omi worried his bottom lip briefly before turning
to his friend.
`Aya-kun please don't say that. Do you have any idea how many people would
kill to be in our positions? Please don't make a scene,' his eyes openly
pleading with him now, the satin aquamarine shirt he was wearing bringing
out their sapphire colour. It was a look that would have melted a heart
of stone, unfortunately Aya wasn't so easily persuaded.
`Omi, I don't care. I just….'
`Glad you two could make it,' Yoshi quietly interrupted causing them both
to jump rather guiltily.
`Yoshi-san,' Omi hurriedly said, `I am sorry we are late, but Hide-san's
laptop took a little longer to fix than I thought it would.' The blonde
was glad to see that Aya was just standing there quietly, his eyes downcast
as if not wanting to meet the drummer's.
`Hello,' the greeting came from what appeared to be a drag queen standing
behind the X Japan leader. Omi blinked, perplexed for a split second before
recognition set in.
`Toshi….san?' he said cautiously, eyes wide with astonishment. The
vocalist glowered.
`Hide..' he explained, almost snarling as he named the guitarist.
`Did I hear someone mention me?' Hide suddenly emerged from the crowd,
his eyes immediately lighting up as he spied the new arrivals. `Its wonderful
you're here,' he said and without warning scooped the small blonde up
in a hug, holding him so close that Omi could feel his alcohol tinged
breath brush his cheek.
`Happy Birthday Hide-san, from the both of us,' Omi said, feeling a little
shy from the guitarist's spontaneous gesture but that was Hide for you,
Yoshi thought fondly. It was times like this that reminded him why the
rest of X Japan eventually gave in to the pink haired man.
At that moment, his kohl-rimmed eyes happen to glance at Toshi and his
mouth immediately curved up in his famous half smile.
`Glad to see that Yoshi's jacket fits,' he said slyly. Toshi's brown eyes
narrowed.
`Asshole!' he spluttered but Hide just blew him a kiss in response.
`You love me really,' he said carelessly before turning his attention
back to Omi and Aya. `Come, let me get you a drink,' he clasped Omi's
wrist and started to pull him towards the bar.
`Shall we follow?' Yoshi said with a smile. Aya hesitated for a moment
before nodding his head, after all there was no use in him just standing
there like an ornament decorating the front door.
They weaved through the crowd but never got further than a few steps at
a time as people kept stopping Yoshi to make small talk. When they finally
did arrive at the crowded granite topped bar, they found Omi flanked by
Pata to his left and Toshi to his right. Aya got himself a Vodka and cranberry
while Yoshi opted for straight up Southern Comfort but before he could
even take a sip, a man dressed in smart black sidled up to him and started
whispering something into his ear causing his calm expression to shift
to one of irritation.
`Fuck!' he swore slamming down his shot glass. `Excuse me,' he apologised
brusquely before disappearing into the crowd.
`Ah, the perils of being a host,' Aya inclined his head in the direction
of Toshi who was nursing a bourbon on the rocks, `you get summoned the
minute something goes wrong.'
`Hmph,' Aya replied.
This flippant gesture really irked Toshi for he considered X Japan more
than just his workmates; they were his family and none so more than Yoshi.
He couldn't understand how his friend could have fallen for a man who
had about as much charm as a block of ice. For one wild moment, he felt
like flooring him but instead just gave him a tight smile.
`Come,' he said his tone just about civil, `I'll show you around.'
For the rest of the evening, Aya found himself being constantly shuffled
between groups of people. Some of who were nice, some of who were famous
and most of who were too drunk to walk straight. But then who could hardly
blame them for the alcohol flowed like a river throughout the night and
he found himself drinking more than he normally would have.
Without realising it, he found himself constantly keeping an eye open
for Yoshi but was only able to catch glimpses of him in the crowd. Once
Yoshi had actually caught him looking and gave him quick apologetic smile
that had made the redhead flush.
Aya would have never admitted it to Omi, but he wouldn't lie to himself
and say that it hadn't crossed his mind about a hundred times throughout
the course of the day about backing out of this party. But every time
he decided he wouldn't go, citing a dozen very good reasons why…..an
image of Yoshi would appear unbidden in his mind, those soft almost melancholic
hazel eyes seemingly able to look right through him.
And suddenly the decision didn't seem so easy or clear-cut anymore.
*
The crowd stared to peter out around 2:30 am, with people leaving in staggered
groups mostly draped over the shoulders of their designated drivers. Toshi
and his girlfriend had left a little earlier followed closely by Heath
and Pata, who seemed to have only each other on their minds. It was now
the birthday boy's turn to leave but not before he fell on Yoshi and gave
him a bone-breaking hug.
`That was an ab-so-lute-ly fucking blast! Sank you Yoshi,' he said, his
words slurring a little as he gave Yoshi a hard kiss on the mouth which
looked innocent enough but only Yoshi could feel the quiver of a tongue
and a quicksilver nip of teeth. Laughing, he pushed both Hide and his
girlfriend out the door and with them gone that just left…
Yoshi started.
Aya…
Sure enough only Aya was present in the living room; his coat draped over
his arm while he repeatedly glanced at his watch. Yoshi raised one eyebrow,
clearly puzzled.
`Where's Omi?' he asked sitting next to the redhead.
`He got a call from work around midnight. Something about an important
server breaking down so he had to go and deal with it.' Yoshi nodded his
head in understanding, he recalled now seeing Omi pacing outside his cellphone
pressed to his ear earlier in the night.
`God you must think I am bad host,' he said a little shamefaced, `not
noticing when one of my guest's leaves.'
`How could you have noticed? There were hundreds of people around and
you had things to attend to,' Aya said trying to sound matter of fact
despite the lingering effects of the large amount of alcohol he had consumed.
`Still,' Yoshi flicked back a lock of caramel coloured hair, `will he
be coming to pick you up?'
Aya nodded.
`Well, until then….you want another drink?' Without waiting for
a reply, Yoshi extracted a square bottle and two shot glasses from a nearby
cabinet. Aya opened his mouth to protest, but his judgement that was blurred
somewhat by alcohol made him decide to throw caution to the wind.
`You'll have to settle for Tequila, it seems to be the only thing that's
left,' Yoshi filled the squat glasses full to the brim with the pale gold
liquid. They clinked their glasses together and simultaneously downed
the potent liquid in one shot. The liquor felt thick on his tongue and
made his lips tingle, its effect almost immediate. As Yoshi poured them
another shot, Aya couldn't help but notice how quiet the surroundings
had become; even the catering staff had gone home.
`So is it true,' Aya suddenly queried in his deep baritone, wanting to
break the silence `that in addition to playing drums and piano, composing
and writing X Japan's songs, you can also play guitar and bass?'
Yoshi nodded.
`Forgive me if this sounds presumptuous but,' Aya idly traced his finger
around the rim of his glass, `is there anything you cant do?'
Yoshi blinked at first and then threw his head back and laughed.
`Well I can't sing, I'm nothing compared to Hide and I am nowhere close
to Toshi's level,' he smiled behind his shot glass.
`Sorry if I find it hard to believe that the band leader of X Japan can't
sing,' Aya said skeptically.
`I'm not a rarity, you'd be surprised how many band leaders would prefer
to play rather than sing,' Yoshi said as he slid a cigarette into his
mouth and lighting it.
Aya however still didn't look convinced, so Yoshi lead him to his grand
piano and sat him on the edge of the bench. He tapped his chin as he contemplated
what to play and after a few minutes of deliberation, played the opening
chord to `Say Anything.'
`Sawameki dake ga kokoro o sashite, kikoenai mune no toiki toki,' he sang
in his husky tenor, `o wasurete motome samayou takanaru, omoi nurashite.'
Aya immediately winced a little. Yoshi was right, his deep voice with
its rough-hewn edges was not suited to the smooth rather romantic melody,
in fact he sounded a little off pitch.
`All right, all right I believe you,' Aya said conceding defeat, `will
you stop singing now.' The last statement wasn't said as an insult as
Aya had a teasing half smile on his face as he said it, which caused Yoshi's
breath to catch his throat.
`See I told you,' he said hoping his voice sounded steady. `And anyway,'
he added slyly, looking up at the redhead through his lashes, `how do
you know I play bass and guitar?'
Aya flushed a little at the question but still answered without missing
a heartbeat.
`Omi,' he said dryly, `he wanted to make sure that I knew everything about
X Japan so I wouldn't embarrass him and played me all your songs in continuous
loop.'
`Omi,' Yoshi said casually tracing a figure of eight in the piano's highly
polished surface, `is he your
koibito?' The minute the word left his lips, Yoshi could have kicked himself
for his artlessness. He had only meant to say boyfriend but instead lover
came out. Gratefully however, Aya didn't seem to notice his slip.
`Omi? God no, what would make you think that?' Aya said bemused, `he already
has a boyfriend but I am single at the moment, why?'
`Oh, no reason…just that you guys are always together that's all,'
Yoshi said, sounding nonchalant but inside he was almost stupidly happy
at the fact that the redhead was unattached.
`Well in that case, let me ask you a question,' Aya tilted his head to
the side so he could get a better look at the pianist, `is there anything
between you and Toshi?'
Yoshi returned Aya's bemused smile with one of his own.
`The tabloids and fangirls would admittedly like there to be something,
unfortunately we must disappoint them. We are just good friends, also
he has a girlfriend whom you might have seen earlier,' Yoshi absentmindedly
ran his fingers up and down the keys playing a nameless tune.
Aya kept silent, the trace of wistfulness in the Yoshi's tone made him
wonder whether the drummer at one point may have wanted things to be different.
He looked at him out of the corner of his eye, watching as he played a
scale, his shoulders slightly slumped over the keyboard. His fingers suddenly
itched to brush back the strands of sand coloured hair and trace slender
line of his jawbone.
`So…do you have a favourite song?' Yoshi asked, trying to lighten
the mood. Aya exhaled slowly, glad that Yoshi had spoken effectively stopping
him from doing anything idiotic.
`It would have to be `Tears',' he said simply, he didn't add how well
he had related to the lyrics or how they had seemed to echo his own thoughts.
`What about `Forever Love'?' Yoshi kept a close eye on the redhead as
he asked the question. He saw Aya's amethyst eyes instantly become shadowed
with what looked like sorrow and immediately wanted to take his words
back.
`It was…it was the favourite song of someone I used to know,' Aya
said quietly, `he always used to love to sing it although he himself admitted
he could hardly carry a tune….'
`Aya..'
At the sound of his name, his lifted his head to see Yoshi's face mere
inches away from his. He had been so lost in the thoughts that he hadn't
notice the drummer moving closer. Slowly, almost as if he were dreaming,
he saw him lift a hand to brush away a crimson eartail.
`I'm sorry, I didn't mean to…'
But his next words were drowned out by the loud blast of a horn from the
outside, startling the both of them. Sanity and reason rapidly came back
to Aya in a rush.
`Id better go,' he said a little shakily as he gathered his things, `thank
you for everything.' He practically jumped off the bench wanting to put
as much distance between him and the rock star.
`Aya, wait!' Yoshi caught his sleeve, which Aya roughly shook off.
`What do you want Yoshi!?' he snapped, the coldness in Aya's tone shocking
him but he wouldn't be dissuaded.
`We finish the tour on Thursday, on Saturday if you're free…..would
you like to have dinner with me?' Yoshi said firmly.
Aya's breathing hitched.
`Are you….asking me out?' he said, the ice turning into pure disbelief.
`You don't have to answer me now,' Yoshi tore off a sheet of paper from
the pad he kept on the hallway table and hurriedly scribbled something
on it. `Here's my number, you don't even have to call me, just text….yes
or no.'
He knew he should have told him that what he wanted was impossible right
there and then. But he took one look at the intensity in Yoshi's eyes
and almost against his will he felt his own eyes soften. For a moment
he sounded very much like Yohji when he was determined. Taking the piece
of paper, he spun on his heel and left.
`Hi Aya-kun,' Omi greeted cheerfully as Aya slid into the passenger seat,
`sorry I'm so late, the problem turned out to be much more complicated
than they let on, the bastards. God, I am going to kill them for making
me miss the rest of Hide-san's party.'
He kept talking as he pulled out of the driveway, telling Aya how everything
had almost crashed and how he had gone about fixing it. It was only when
they were on the highway that Omi realised that Aya hadn't said a word
since stepping into the car. He frowned as he saw the strange expression
on his friend's face.
`Aya..kun? Are you ok?' he asked concerned. The blonde saw the skin of
Aya's throat move as he swallowed.
`He…Yoshi….just asked me out,' Aya said the words barely audible.
Omi stared at him, his mouth wide open and almost drove into the steel
divider if Aya hadn't caught hold of the wheel.
`Omi,' he growled, `eyes on the road!'
`Sorry, sorry,' he apologised forcing his gaze back to darkness that stretched
before him. They drove in silence for a while until Omi, after making
sure there were no other cars on the road, turned his attention back to
the redhead.
`Are you....' Omi paused tentatively, `are you going to say yes?' Aya
didn't meet his eyes, choosing instead to stare out the window.
`I don't know,' he said quietly. It wasn't the thought of the date that
disturbed him, it was Yoshi. There was no use in denying it, he was attracted
to him, and tonight's incident had just brought those feelings to the
forefront. Although the time they had known each other had been brief,
somehow the leader of X Japan had gotten to him.
The part of him that was sensible didn't want to go any further with this,
to nip in the bud whatever…this…..was. But the part of him
that was stubborn wanted him to face it and prove to himself that his
attraction to the rock star was nothing more than a passing feeling that
would last as long a summer spell.
The two sides battled, shouting their reasons to each other in his head
until finally, Aya reached a decision. Taking his phone and the number
Yoshi had given him out of his pocket, he flicked his fingers over the
keys spelling out his reply.
`What's your answer?' Omi asked. When Aya showed him, he bit his lip.
`Are you sure?' he asked, not wanting the redhead to regret it later.
Aya pressed the `Send' key.
`Yes,' he said softly as he sank back into his seat.
***
That night, Aya dreamt about Yohji for the first time in months.
*
It had been a day just like any other. Yohji had been responding positively
to his new course of treatment and as a result was feeling better than
usual. Not great….just better, but Aya had learned to cherish these
small milestones. As Yohji went for his treatment, Aya took the opportunity
to nip back to the shop to check on how Aya-chan and her then new boyfriend
Ken, a local soccer coach, were doing.
It was evening when he finally returned. The sky was the colour of cool
blue smoke and the temperature perfect for sitting outside on your doorstep
to have a cigarette. Aya smiled at the thought and then frowned, he blamed
the influence of his chain smoking boyfriend for causing him to think
like that.
The hospital was unusually quiet as he entered. This statement wasn't
as strange as it sounded for there would always be the soft noise of humming
machinery juxtaposed with the muted voices of the hospital staff and visitors.
However visiting hours were now over and the nurses were pouring over
the day's paperwork at their stations.
Lara, the night nurse gave Aya a small smile as he passed which he returned.
He noted offhandedly though that the smile didn't reach her almond shaped
eyes, but as she was one of Yohji's many admirers it was no surprise she
resented him….not that he cared.
He entered his lover's private room only to be greeted by the sight of
Yohji, out of his green hospital gown and reclining lazily on the stuffed
cream coloured chair that sat in the corner. He was looking out the window;
his profile outlined against the fading light his hair even blonder under
the fluorescent glare. He was dressed in one of his old outfits, a tight
black T that showed off his still toned stomach and his long legs encased
in what had once been tight jeans.
Regardless the scene still made his heart turn over. Only Yohji could
have that effect on him, a privilege he knew the blonde man had always
relished.
`Yohji?' he said tentatively, more surprised actually. Yohji turned at
the sound of his name and gave the redhead a slow smile.
`Hello my love,' he drawled, slinking off the chair with an easy grace
to stand face to face with his lover. Aya raised his eyebrow and his lips
twitched upwards into a bemused smile.
`You must be feeling better then,' he said softly running his hands through
Yohji's sun kissed hair, pushing it behind his ears. Yohji smirked.
`What do you think?' he murmured, his jade green eyes gleaming like a
cat's. He cupped Aya's chin for a teasing kiss, nipping softly at his
dry lips before wetting them with his tongue. Aya wrapped his slender
arms around his lover's neck, the floral scent of generic hospital soap
and Head&Shoulders filling his nostrils.
At the back of his mind, a sensible voice kept telling him that they shouldn't
be doing this, but Yohji's heart stopping kisses made him forget everything
else except his desire and hunger for the blonde.
`Lets get this off shall we,' Yohji murmured pulling handfuls of Aya's
red shirt from his pants as the shorter man's hands tangled further in
his hair. Hooking his fingers through the loops of the redhead's jeans,
he was slowly leading them towards the bed when he suddenly collapsed,
almost tumbling to the floor if Aya hadn't quickly caught him by the elbow.
`Yohji!' Aya said alarmed, helping the blonde to his bed. `Shit, we shouldn't
have done this, I'll call the nurse…'
`Don't!' Yohji took deep breaths as if he suddenly sported a lead weight
on his chest. Aya glared at him.
`Don't be stupid,' he said sharply. Yohji's head jerked up.
`If you do they'll say, “I told you so”,' he snapped, eyes
flashing. Violet eyes looked at him, stunned.
`What do you mean? Explain,' Aya demanded drawing his hand back. Yohji
gripped the edge of his bed.
`I didn't let them bathe me,' he said as nonchalantly as possible, `I
told them I wanted to shower, shave and dress myself.'
He winced as he rubbed his knees. `It must have taken more out of me than
I realised.' Aya pressed his lips together to try and keep his cutting
reiterations at bay but failed.
`You idiot!' he burst out, `why the hell did you do something as crazy
as that when you know your not strong enough?'
`Because I wanted to make myself presentable to you again you arrogant
dick! I wanted you to want to be with me again,' Yohji angrily looked
away, hating that it had come to this. Aya took a step back at his lover's
confession.
`Yohji…' he was at a loss for words but finally understanding, `I…..I
didn't mean to make you feel that way. Its not that I don't want you,
but I just….well, I didn't want to hurt you.'
Now it was Yohji's turn to be taken aback.
`Hurt me?' he said genuinely bewildered, `Aya, I am not made of glass,
you cant hurt me.'
`Yes I can,' Aya said bluntly, crossing
his arms. Yohji sighed and rubbed the back of his neck.
`Be that as it may….you can't hurt me this way,' he carefully pushed
himself off the bed. When he was finally standing before his boyfriend,
he took Aya's pale hands and placed them on his chest.
`You could never hurt me this way…' the naked emotion into those
viridian depths all too visible.
`How could you say that after what just happened,' he argued although
he felt his resolve weakening. `Yohji, I don't want to…' he turned
away only to have Yohji catch his chin.
`I miss touching you Aya, I miss holding you,' he ran a finger down his
finely molded jawline, `I physically ache to be with you.' He wrapped
his arms around the redhead and pulled him close till his head rested
on his shoulder. Aya closed his eyes and pressed his face into the smooth
dip where neck and shoulder meet trying to ignore how thin he had become.
Yohji didn't voice it, but the redhead knew what he was thinking.
`Because I don't know when's the last time that I'll get to hold you…'
Only then did Aya realised he had been going about it the wrong way and
in the process made his boyfriend feel like shit. Well he was going to
make it up to him, starting now.
`I missed you to Yohji,' he whispered huskily into his ear, the blatantly
suggestive note sending sparks right down to Yohji's groin. His breath
hitched.
`Aya…'
`I miss feeling you in me Yohji,' he playfully bit the yielding flesh
of Yohji's earlobe, `I miss the feel of your mouth taking me in and sucking
me. Feeling you stretch and ream me till I can barely walk…'
`Keep that up and this is going to be short,' Yohji warned barely keeping
the tremble of desire out of his voice. Aya drew back and wet his lips,
all the while his eyes never leaving his lover's face.
`Then I guess you'd better fuck me then.' He slowly pushed the blonde
backwards until his knees hit the bed and forced him to sit down. Placing
his hands on either side of his hips, he leaned in for a slow kiss deliberately
slipping his tongue between the blonde's lips. An offer Yohji accepted,
nipping and sucking the soft muscle causing Aya to gasp.
Practiced hands soon undid the fly of Yohji's jeans before slipping inside
to stroke his semi-hard cock. Yohji partly lifted himself off the bed
so that he could more easily shrug off his pants.
`Shall we?' he murmured. After Aya nodded, he scooted himself up the bed
while his boyfriend dealt with the task of removing his own clothing.
If this had been any other time, Aya would have liked to do a slow strip
for him but days without being with him had pushed his patience to the
breaking point. Yohji flipped off the main light switch leaving only the
table lamp, which illuminated the room in a soft amber glow.
He climbed on to the bed, careful not to disturb anything that might bring
the hospital down on them. The last thing he wanted now was an audience
of gawking doctors and nurses. Aya slowly inched the tight top upwards,
gradually baring the smooth flesh beneath which he worshipped with his
mouth. He slipped it over the top of the blonde's head before brushing
his lips against Yohji's delicate collarbone, groaning as he felt his
cock slide against the blonde's hair roughened belly.
`Aya,' Yohji moaned, `Aya!' he gasped even louder as he felt Aya reach
behind him to slowly pump his already slick cock in his fist.
`Yohji…' Emerald eyes fluttered open just in time to see Aya pop
his fingers that were glistening with pre-cum in his mouth and started
to suck. That almost snapped his control and he had to stifle the urge
bury his cock in the redhead there and then.
`If he wants to play it that way…' Yohji suddenly grabbed his forearms
and flipped him over so that his lover was now beneath him. Aya glared
up at the former playboy.
`Don't overdo…' his words trailed off as he felt Yohji's tongue
stab at one hardened nipple while its twin was being mercilessly teased
by Yohji's thumb. He bent Aya's legs at the knee and shifted them apart
so he could nestle in between his smooth thighs.
`I believe you said something about my mouth,' his voice rough with lust.
He dragged his tongue up and down
the weeping shaft, tracing endless patterns on the head causing Aya to
grasp the sheets.
`Fuck…,' Aya wanted to say `you' but instead said, `…me.'
Yohji gave his lover an evil smile before engulfing the very tip of his
penis with his mouth. Aya bit his lip to keep from screaming as his hips
sought to push his cock further into his lover's throat.
Yes, this was what Yohji wanted. He didn't want some pity fuck; he wanted
Aya to want this as much as he did. He wanted to drive him to the point
where all he cared about was Yohji fucking him into the mattress.
`God Yohji, please! I… I'm so..' Yohji swallowed the rest of his
lover's words as he moved upwards to plant a hard kiss on his mouth. He
quickly stretched out a long limb to pull open the bedside drawer and
grab the metal tube of lubricant he had placed there earlier.
`Yohji,' Aya voice almost breaking with desire, `fuck…I need you
to…'
`Shh, just a little bit longer,' Yohji coated two fingers with the gel
before using them to penetrate the redhead's tight entrance. He spread
them, carefully stretching and loosening that tight ring of muscle while
his other hand smoothed the lubricant over his own hard flesh. After deciding
he was ready, he let his fingers slip out and replaced them with the head
of his cock. He penetrated him with one smooth motion until his hips were
flush against his lover's.
`Fuck Aya…so good! You feel so fucking good,' he groaned as he started
to move, hooking the redhead's legs over his shoulders bending him almost
double.
Grasping the back of his blonde head, Aya moaned. `Deeper..' he panted,
`I want you deeper…'
`If you want deeper Aya,' Yohji growled knowingly. Understand what his
boyfriend was getting at, they moved around until Aya was now on top,
all the while never breaking contact. Raising himself off the blonde's
body with his hips, he impaled himself further on his stiff cock. Sparks
of pure pleasure flooded his senses as Yohji's erection kept repeatedly
brushing his prostate.
The feeling was overwhelming yet it wasn't enough. He wrenched a hand
away to wrap it around his own neglected shaft. That was the catalyst,
as Yohji's body slammed upward one last time before surrendering to his
orgasm. A few frantic strokes and Aya too came, his semen staining the
blonde's tummy.
As Yohji's vision slowly swam back into focus, he became aware of the
sound of his lover's jagged breathing. Pulling him so that he was resting
on his chest, he gently tilted him over till they were both lying side
by side on the bed. He carefully withdrew from the tight confines of Aya's
body hoping to minimise the inevitable discomfort.
`I love you Aya,' he whispered into his ear, `God, never forget how much
I love you.'
`Love you to Yohji,' he planted a soft kiss on the base of his throat,
`now lets get some sleep.' He snuggled closer, enjoying the steady beat
of his lover's heart letting it lull him to sleep.
*
Up till this point, the dream had been very much like countless others
he had previously experienced. It had been one of the last times he and
Yohji had made love before he got to sick, however there was something
different about this time. He shifted uneasily in his sleep as a new memory
started to filter through.
He must have been half-asleep and not completely aware of what was happening,
but now he recalled Yohji soundlessly stroking his hair for the longest
time. When he finally did speak, his words came out soft and dry.
`Don't be sad when I'm gone Aya,' he brushed just the tips of his fingers
over the contours of his lover's face. `I hope you find someone who'll
make you as happy as you have made me.'
He gently kissed his forehead. `I don't want you to remember me with tears,
I'd rather you'd forget me than remember me that way.'
`Yohji..' without realising it a tear had traced a path down his cheek,
carrying with it all the pain of a heart that wouldn't forget. All of
a sudden his mind evoked a memory of someone's soft touch that held the
fleeting promise of being able to take that pain away causing Aya, who
was still in the deep pull of sleep to subconsciously shape a name on
his lips.
`Yoshi..'
***
Additional Note: . For those of you who have already read, you would have
noticed that I switched it around. After rereading several times, I’ve
come to the conclusion that it reads and makes more sense this way.
If you agree with me or think otherwise please tell me... I am always
open to constructive criticism ^_^
Ja!
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